This blog probably wont be used anymore, because I've become bored with it... again.

I'm moving it back to my xanga site.

www.xanga.com/darthemo

Fairly easy to remember, even for you hippies

Have fun

Listening to: The Used - All That I've Got
Watching: The Weather Channel

It's 3:26 am, do you know where your children are?

I would hope so, because if not, you are a horrible parent and are probably going to hell.

Anyway...

As I stated, it's 3:26... er, 3:28 am, and here I sit in front of this virtual window, to a equally virtual world.... bored out of my flippin mind!

I haven't slept well since last Tuesday, and by slept well, I mean sleeping more than 4 hours a night, as I was accustomed to since starting college. I suppose that sacrificing sleep, for this feeling of happiness, is fine and dandy... only... it's hard to be happy when you've been awake for 4 days and have an exam. Anwyho...

I have to go to Tazewell later today to look for an apartment for when I move back in a matter of weeks. Normally, this would be a normal trip back like every other Thursday before it... only, the road conditions are supposed to suck hardcore. So hardcore in fact, I'm only gonna abbreviate it. The road conditions are going to 'suk hxc'... Gawd, that's so poser-ish.... and alas, I don't care, because it's now 3:33 am...

Is there a point to this?
Probably not....

Are you still intrigued?
Probably not....

Am I gonna keep typing?
Yup....

I found a copy of my very first EP today, the only copy in existence as a matter of fact. It's called "I love it when you fail", I can't believe I was that cynical when I was 15 or 16... it's almost sad, notice, that I said almost... because I liked being cynical and jaded back then.

Anyway, this blog is going no where fast, so I'm gonna shoot it in the brain and stop it's suffering.

Farewell, and wish me luck, so that I don't die while driving.

Listening to: Story Of The Year - Page Avenue
Watching: Tommy Boy

First off, the title of this blog has nothing at all to do with the blog itself. It just happened to be the song that was on right before this one.

Anyway...

I've got 11 weeks until this semester is over, and then I'm more than likely going to be moving back to Tazewell.

I haven't really talked this over the with parental units, and I don't really plan on doing so. Bristol doesn't have anything that Tazewell lacks, except more places to get drunk, but that means zilch to me. It does however, lack many things that Tazewell has. Such as a chruch I like, Judith, my friends, and a college where I actually know people.

All I have to do is find a reasonably priced apartment, and a roomie... and then I'm all set.

I have nothing else to say really, so I'll take my leave now.

Take care.

Listening to: The Used - All That I've Got
Watching: A download progress bar....

Why is it that people will tell you one thing with thier lips, and then something completely different with thier actions, attitude and comments made to other people?

It's quite frsutrating.

I guess I need to get used to this though.

I'm pretty ticked off right now, so I'll probably go work out in a bit.

I think some free-fighting would be good tonight.

Listening to: Crossfade - So Far Away
Watching: Comedy Central

I just finished writing a paper for my technical writing class. I started it at noon, and I literally just finished it 5 minutes ago. The sad thing is... it's only 1.5 pages long.... and that's double spaced.

I'm not looking forward to the rest of this class. I think it'll end up killing me. I am certain that my teacher is related to Satan. I'm guessing grandmother of satan or something, cause she's quite old.... and evil.

On a completely different note about writing, my new song came together in about 20 minutes. I can't fathom why it takes me so long to write papers, and so little time to write lyrics and such.

I haven't been able to get more than 2 hours of sleep a night since Tuesday, and the only nights I even got 2 hours was last night.

I don't know why I can't sleep, I think it's God's way of playing practical jokes on me.

Anyway, I'm going to turn my brain off now.

Still happy.

Listening to: Crazy Chipmunk Song
Watching: Random Infomercials

God won't let me sleep.

No, really. He won't. I think he's getting amusement out of this, haha.

I'm exhausted, I'm not used to being awake like this anymore.

I would take some sleeping pills but we all remember how that turned out last time, don't we?

I've been talking to Judith since she woke up today at 2:00 in the afternoon.... and it's now close to 4:30am. Oddly enough we haven't ran out of things to talk about yet.

I usually run out of things to talk about with people in under 10 minutes, and there is a big difference between 10 minutes and 14 hours.

I like being happy.

Listening to: Hawthorne Heights - Niki FM
Watching: N/A

So yeah, I've sat here for 20 minutes trying to think of something to write. I can't seem to think of anything to write, so I'll just explain why I'm happy.

I'm happy that I found someone who understands what they believe, someone who I can be in a relationship with, but not have to worry about where they stand when it comes to eternity, someone who can help get me back on track if I fall off (which she did).

I'm happy that our conversations don't consist of me sitting, staring and thinking of how many ways I could kill myself with the hat rack standing across the room, while she explains why her ex-boyfriend is a jerk.

I'm happy that I found someone who is legit. Someone who doesn't put on a pretty little mask and not tell me when something is bothering her.

Most importantly, I'm happy I found someone who understands that none of us are perfect, and accepts Jordan for Jordan.

Listening to: Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
Watching: N/A

Life is so very, very good.

I'd love to ellaborate more on why life is so very, very good, but I cannot. Mainly because it's 2:30am, and I'm doing a crapload of backed homework.... and yet, I am still happy.

That's the true test folks, when you haven't slept in days, you're exhausted, you drove 2.5 hours to see someone even though you had homework, and now you're doing it in the middle of the night... and you are still happy.

Then it's good, and real.

Anyway, enough of my mushy babbling.

I'm off to finish this work.

Farewell.

Listening to: The Black Maria - Our Commitment's A Sickness
Watching: Just finished 'Office Space'

Remember all that hubbub that I was going on about regarding being sotic and whatnot for the rest of my natural life?

Well apparently, one cannot actually say such things. I never knew what was just up the road and around the bend from that experience, and now I wouldn't place any amount of money on me being stoic... at all.

I are teh happy.

And that's all I'm going to say about this... for now anyway.

Listening to: Straylight Run - It's For The Best
Watching: Nothing at all

I realized tonight, why I became closed off in the first place. I never really thought about why some people are so stoic, until now, and I do believe I've figured it out. People prefer to be stoic, because it keeps them from getting hurt. Plain and simple, that's all there is to it.

People argue that it is better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all... I find it laughable that most of the people who quote that line so freely, are married and have at least one child.

It's like watching an infomercial for an exercise machine. You always see attractive, muscular, shapely people working out on the machine. You never see a fat guy running on a treadmill. People love to quote things to you, and tell you how you should look, think, or feel.... all without ever knowing the feeling themselves.

I am now recommitting my life to being stoic, I've been hurt more times that I care to think about, and I'm not going to get hurt again. I have loved, and lost... and I would prefer to never love again. Such is my lot in life. I am well equipped for a life of solitude, I have my intellect and my books to keep me company.

Until next time....